“Wolves find the balance between separateness and unity. Even the lone wolf is part of the pack. Instead, we tend to seek one or the other, making individuality and community into an either or proposition. Wolf knows he is both. For us humans, this wisdom is lost early on, as soon as the ego makes its debut….When you know your place in the pack, you too, can sit back, relax and howl at the moon.” GABRIELLE ROTH
At this time I feel drawn to write about how we are all in this together. Or, as Gabrielle often used to say: “There is only one of us here.” Actually, I want to write about how that is possible in a workshop, in a room full of people, where all of us are going our own way, healing our own wound, following our own body and destiny, uniquely and originally – this 5Rhythms map opens the same doors for all of us, the same song moves the whole group (maybe each one of us in different directions) and when the teacher speaks many people have the feeling he or she is talking directly to them. This is something I have always loved about this 5Rhythms practice – the emphasis being both on personal freedom and sense of tribe, community. There is space for spreading our own wings and rooting our own feet, with no need to follow others’ footsteps or choreography and at the same time there is invitation and need on being aware of the empty space between myself and the other. So many times at the end of the Wave, there is a deep sense of belonging and connection to the group without necessarily working it.
In my life, there’s been a huge hole with this apparent dichotomy. I haven’t seen many examples of it being possible, that it was possible to be yourself, unique, free, and at the same time to belong, to connect with the group, tribe or family. As if one excluded the other. For a number of years now, I have been realizing, understanding and practicing the idea that one is closely connected to the other, actually that these are inseparable. We are hungry for both of those, and we don’t have to choose one over the other.
When I am in need of attention, hug, company, feedback, one of my behavioural patterns is to try hard and pretend not to need it, or even push it away when it’s offered. The dance is a place where this has become even more evident and more painful, and that’s why it is the place where healing, risk-taking, playing, exploring and connecting can start. Just the fact that every part of my body and my being is immersed in the movement means that „I“ as I know it, my ego part, is less. My usual patterns, old fortified defences, my own games of thrones are less present, weaker and fall silent. I am able to meet this lonely part of myself more easily, and when I let myself in, I can let you in, too, I can feel my place in the group, the ecosystem, the Solar system, the Infinity.
Every time when you come to the dance you have a chance of meeting yourself, of meeting someone else, especially when you least expect it, or when you stop expecting it; there’s a chance of meeting with the group and the bigger picture; there is a possibility of the feeling that we are all in this together and that there is only one of us here. See you there hopefully.