Many people would come to me after the workshop and thank me for holding a space with so much permission. It made me curious about why this is so important and healing and how it helps us with whatever we are learning. There is a part in me that feels dictated by some rigid beliefs about what I must or should do as well as about what I can’t or shouldn’t do. “I must always be strong” and “I should take care of others” or “I can’t break down” and “women shouldn’t make the first move”. These beliefs somehow formed an alliance with my fears and like to keep the status quo.
I discovered that these parts of me are in need of permission and if I am not able to offer it to myself, I look to somebody outside of me. Permission has the power to offer me choice and possibilities where I feel limited. Permission counters these rigid commands and prohibitions. Permission creates space where I feel accepted as I am. Permission moves me and encourages me to expand myself and my life.
I love bringing this theme into the movement practice, as so often I find myself stuck in my flow feeling that I should move a certain way or that I cannot move in some way. My flow reaches this limitation that probably came from outside of me but now lives deep inside of me, and it actually even physically stops me, limiting the freedom of my movement.
In this respect I find the Rhythm of Flowing specially healing. It feels like Flowing is whispering to me “Yes, you can”, “It is OK to move this way”. It feels like Flowing is solid enough and fluid enough to hold me with all my blocks, limitations, frozen places. There is enough space to be who I am, and it embraces gently and with warmth the parts of me that are essentially organically fluid, alive and free as well as the parts of me that still believe the old beliefs that may have even been important for my survival as a child.
As I bring the permission into my mind, heart and the body, I feel my own courage waking up and standing right next to me, hip to hip, hand in hand, and I start feeling my spine strengthening, my feet rooting, my chest beating, my eyes opening, I am ready to move, ready to grow, ready to live life I was meant to live. There were so many times when I felt something hadn’t been permitted, allowed, accepted and I found myself looking for somebody else to tell me that I was not crazy for feeling this way, that how I was feeling made sense. Heartbeat practice is showing me how to become the authority on my own heart. How when emotion comes to me, I have the authority and power to give myself permission to feel this way. I have permission to move how I feel, I have permission to express how I feel and I have all the permission to let it go.
Permission starts teaming up with Courage surrounded by the continuous strong Flowing field and – wow – anything is possible. I no longer feel the need to apologize for who I am or to explain why I feel this way. I find the inner strength supporting me to stand up in my own truth and dance in my own beauty. And as I meet others, this permission becomes a vibration that spreads so contagious, inspiring and generous.
I look forward to meet you in this field that we can create together
With love, Silvija