November 2024

| December 1, 2024

“As Heisenberg said in his uncertainty principle, you can’t measure a particle’s momentum and position in the same time because particles are always in motion. The self is the same way. The self is a dance, constantly in motion. In its uncertainty and fluidity, the self is utterly fascinating. Imagine how boring you would be if you never changed, if you were frozen in time with the same heroes, hairdos and heartaches.” GABRIELLE ROTH

In this dance there is space for you, for me, for them, for us, and for the others.

In this dance there is space for those who need more space, those who cannot find their place, those who are always in their place and those who are never in one spot.

In this dance there is space for those who are feeling like beginners, for those who are afraid to begin and then do, for those for whom this is a continuation of some other beginning, and those who are waiting for their dance to begin.

In this dance there is space for those who connect with their body quickly and easily, for those who need time and support and for those for whom this is the greatest challenge right now.

In this dance there is space for those who adore music and surrender to its every call, for those who are sensitive and picky about music, and for those who prefer to dance without music, in silence, to the soundtrack of their breath and heartbeat.

In this dance there is space for those who find their safe space here, for those who find their edge and dance on it, and for those who like to leap into the great unknown.

In this dance there is space for those who feel that they are the problem, for those who feel that others are the problem, for those who feel that everything is a problem, and for those who feel there are no problems.

In this dance there is space for those who wish to find something, for those who wish to let something go, for those who wish to discover something, and for those who wish to forget something.

In this dance there is space for those who feel OK being the centre of attention, for those who feel OK being on the fringes of society, for those who feel OK in corners, and those who like hanging out in hallways.

In this dance, there is space for those who feel safer with books, for those who feel safer on social media, for those who feel safer on stage, for those who feel safer at home, and for those who feel safer moving.

In this dance there is space for those who feel beautiful when they dance, for those who feel clumsy when they dance, for those who feel as though all eyes are on them when they dance, for those who feel in their natural element when they dance, and for those who feel they are a part of the Universe when they dance.

In this dance there is space for those who appreciate having this quality time with themselves, for those who appreciate the intimacy which is possible pretty quickly when we dance with someone we do not know, for those who surf and fly on the wings of the group, and feel they belong to a tribe.

In this dance there is space for those who look out at the world through pink glasses, for those who have X-ray vision and no illusions, for those who prefer to close their eyes and dream, for those who see a part of themselves in everything that surrounds them, and for those who see red.

And most of all in this dance there is space for change, for a shift from one place to another, for a change of perspective, for changing roles and a possibility of a different experience. In just two hours of a class or workshop so much can change. Perhaps, not our initial state per se, but our perception of it and ourselves, our relationship with that state and with ourselves.

I invite YOU to send me a sentence beginning with “In this dance there is space for…”
 

With love, Silvija

April 2021

| April 5, 2021

“Many of us have the idea that emotional energy is like fuel – if you spend it, use it, give it away, then you’ll have less. This energy, however, is not a commodity the becomes depleted with use. Like the blood in our circulatory system, it needs to flow, to be used up, and will replenish itself and keep us healthy.” GABRIELLE ROTH

 

The teaching of the Wave has been a solid ground on my journey of learning about emotions as well as for holding space for others to do the same. 
The Heartbeat level of 5Rhythms has brought to me so much understanding about the interconnectedness between my body and my heart, as well as between my movement and my breath. 
This is for me a place where healing can happen. 
 
So many times I heard others (and they were not The Beatles), and even myself say things like: “Oh just let it be.”  Like it is a piece of cake. Like there is only a short distance between this place of discomfort where I am now and this place of deep peace. For me this is the journey. And sometimes we need more time in one of the phases then in others, depending on a situation.
 
I also realised that if I am usually struggling with the rhythm of Flowing that I might struggle with the part of the journey that Gabrielle taught as “let it in.” Or if Chaos rhythm is something I try to avoid by checking on how everybody else is doing in the room, I might need more practice in the “letting go” part.
 
Gabrielle called the following the “L-map”. Each of these 5 steps are somehow not enough on their own, they all complement and support each other. I can not use “let it go” for every situation. “Let it be” is not always an answer for everything.  This is a also a Wave.
  
LET IT IN
 
I focus my breathing on the inhale. I open my body for the movement. I open my senses for the life of this moment. I flow with these sensations, emotions, vibrations inside of me. I let them flow around and with each other. What I see, what I hear, what I taste and smell, what I touch, what I sense and feel – it is all here for me, for my attention only. 
 
And after I gathered all the information I need, my personal experience wants to be communicated, it wants to make contact with what is outside of me. Whatever I let in and move with inside of me, and carry with me, it needs to come out eventually in one form or another, in one shape or another. 
 
LET IT OUT
 
What can really come out from me and through me if I let nothing and noone in? Do I make empty promises? How do I (he)articulate myself clearly? How do I regulate what comes out of me based on who is in front of me? What is the message I want to have come through? Where is the safe space for me to freely and fully vent, scream, spit it out? Sometimes the only way for me to make a decision is to put out all the options, lay down all the cards. 
It took me a lot of practice to shorten the gap between when somebody would hurt me and me saying “ouch!”
 
LET IT GO
 
When I am in pain, I can cry it out, dance it out, shake it out, twitter it out as much as I want, but eventually, to be free of that pain, I need to let it go. 
 
There is a part of me that jumps on a problem like a pit bull, and I come at it from all the sides, and I try this and I call that person, and I Google that, and I ask for help, and I pray, and I push it all the way to the edge- the edge of surrender. I kill the shit out of the problem, and it may even feel like I am trying to resuscitate it when I finally realise I have truly done everything I could, I did everything that is in my power, and it is time to stop holding on and let my hands go. 
 
LET GO OF LETTING GO
 
I feel there is never enough work with letting go, there is always some new shit coming out, on a daily basis; so it is a true medicine to recognise a moment when it’s time to let go of letting go. I get that when I clean the dust at home, and while I am cleaning it from my furniture I can see the new one falling down in the same moment.  It is somehow like that the very act of letting go of my past is still keeping one of my feet there, and if I truly want to be in this present moment I need to also let go of letting go. 
 
Time for a break. Time to chill. Time for a cake. Time to take it easy. Time to relax. Time to celebrate what I cleaned and cleansed and released so far. Time to notice the softness of relief. Time to feel the lightness of emptiness. 
 
 
LET IT BE
 
And then arriving to this place – it might look like magic. And that magic was actually a whole journey. A journey full of snorts, sweat, tears and wanting to give up. Mixed with some cake. Sometimes too much cake. The funny thing is that when I arrive to this sweet spot, I realise it was actually always here. It is not a place at the end of the rainbow. It is more like the vast clear blue sky behind the clouds and thunder and rain and sunshine and stars. It is that place where things make sense again thanks to the wisdom thanks to the each step of the journey (especially those steps through the time when nothing made sense).
Here and now I can take a deeper inhale and a longer exhale. Here and now I can even find some closure.
 
 
PS 
Although I used the word cake more then I used the word dance in this text, this text is still about the dance. 

March 2021

| March 8, 2021

“Art is all around us and we are all artists. You may not be Picasso, but there’s a force within you which drives you to create art .The spirit of magic and creativity you bring to everything you do inspires what I call “everyday art”. Life is full of raw material – whether you work at the local bakery or in a corporate office, the level of awareness, attention, and inspiration you bring to your job can transform it to art.” GABRIELLE ROTH

I wouldn’t say my parents were creative, but they would hang out with many creative people. At the time when my mother was studying piano at the Music Academy in Zagreb, the musicians and composers were hanging out with actors and directors who were hanging out with painters and photographers who were hanging out with writers and poets. From an early age I could sense the difference between creative people and those who chose a safer life. My mum loved discovering and supporting talents as a piano teacher, and it was hard for me to suck at playing the piano. I was more into drawing and painting and she was very encouraging of me. My parents even organised an exhibition at our home where we put my paintings up for sale. Unforgettable. For a kid to see adults buying her art. Then I started to go to school and the art teacher told me that the grass can not be purple. And I stopped.  I still paint like that little child, my drawings never “grew up”. 

Both of my parents loved music, and I have learnt that classical music is what Latin is for languages. It opens and educates the ear and the part of the brain that can see the movement and colours of music. This musical upbringing saved me when I started teaching 5Rhythms and awakening the sacred DJ in me. There is no genre of music that I would not be ready to play and use to create a specific movement. 

Music went straight to my innocent heart and it has always been a loyal companion. There was a song for when I fell in love and there was a song for when my heart was broken. There was a song somehow for every feeling I had. 
When I would watch dancers dancing and ice skaters skate, I was moved to tears. They looked like magic, they moved like both – so physical and so divine. 
And I tried. I tried ballet, I tried African dance, I tried contemporary dance, and I struggled, following the steps. I believed I had no discipline. I felt totally opposite from how I would feel when dancing at home alone or dancing in the club as soon as it opened when the dance floor was still empty. 

Then I found 5Rhythms, or 5Rhythms found me!

I found a place where I finally felt creative. I was creating the dance I was dancing. Or as Gabrielle would say “co-creating with the great mystery”. I felt talented even though I didn’t need to be at all. I felt unique in the midst of equally unique and different people. Suddenly I even had the discipline! 

I remember in school the teachers would say about me “she is smart but lazy”. Now I was happy and free. I started to heal the wounds I wasn’t even aware of. I met people I would have been either scared to meet or people I would think with whom I would have nothing in common. I travelled not just too many cities and countries of this world, but also many mountains and valleys of my psyche.  
I learnt and I practised to be creative with the way I move. Creative with the way I speak and write. Creative with my pain. Creative with my boredom. Creative with my shadow. Creative with the way I relate through my heart. Creative with my attention and my presence. Creative with my life. 

It is such a gift and honour to hold space for others to join me in this and to support this creativity we have as humans. I want to shout a big THANK YOU, to all dancers who have been dancing with me online once, twice or even every week, for these last 12 months. YOU blew my mind, recharged my heart, gave me a reason to change at least the top of my pyjama for a class, inspired me to learn new ways of teaching, restored my discipline and infused me with hope. 

With love, 
Silvija 

February 2021

| March 8, 2021

“What we want is what philosopher Paul Ricoeur calls “second naïveté”: a freshness of response, a spontaneity that is seasoned with wisdom and experience. And to achieve this we have to let our emotions surface, get to know and appropriate them: have them flowing in our life so that we fear what really threatens us, get angry at what invades our integrity, cry when we get hurt, smile when it all goes right, and care about the real needs of others.” GABRIELLE ROTH

I already know how to make myself invisible when I am scared and it all feels too much so that eventually even I stop noticing myself. 
I already know how to swallow the hurt from all those little violations of my personal boundaries thinking it is all under my control until the ticking bomb of my anger gets out of (my) control. 
I already know how to fill the void of my loneliness with chocolate and I would rather make friends with characters of TV series than sit next to my sadness. 
I already know how to kill the buzz of my excitement with “it’s too good to be true” and “it won’t last long”, and surprise, surprise: I missed all the fun. 
I already practiced hiding in the corner and watching my life pass me by, wondering what’s the point until the point of no return. 

What I want to practice now is how to offer my physical embodiment to the movement of my emotions. I am ready to learn about this treasure in my chest and explore all the different textures, volumes, vibrations, flavors, shapes of my heart’s responses to being alive.  When I start feeling something I want to welcome it with my physical vocabulary, so that I don’t even need to go to my head to name it and then analyze it or justify it or deny it or compare it or judge it. I want to meet the movement of my heart with the fluidity of my body and curiosity of my mind.
I want to practice how to keep breathing when I’m frozen, how to stay centered when I’m outraged, how to stay soft when I’m breaking down and breaking through, how to stay grounded when I’m elated, how to be tender when I’m suffering. 

Heartbeat workshop is an opportunity to approach our emotional world with the instincts of a dancer, with the mindfulness of a meditator, with the courage of a warrior, with the compassion of a best friend. 
It is time to take a rest from trying to solve our feelings like they are some problems, to take time off from thinking over and over about it and rehashing the past in our mind. It gives us a possibility to enter those chambers of our heart that feel uncomfortable, maybe because there are no lights on, because there is some weird smell, because the space feels too big or too small, because they told us to keep away. This time we don’t need to go there alone, we can enter followed by our dance, witnessed by a teacher, supported by a group and inspired by our own evolution that wants us to heal and grow. 
We learn to trust our impulses, respect our boundaries and follow our heart to a life where everything can be touched by the power of love. 
I look forward to meeting you there!

With love, 
Silvija

January 2021

| March 8, 2021

“In inertia our fullness is empty; in ecstasy our emptiness is full.” GABRIELLE ROTH

 

I wanted to write first about all the most important things I have learnt in 2020 to help me remember those lessons. Then I started making a list of all the things that I have lost and all the things that have arrived in my life last year to find some balance. After that I thought it would be better to create a blessing, a prayer for the New Year, to create a vision and focus on all the things I want to bring into my life and begin this 2021 with intentions grounded in my heart.
Then I realised I am actually pretty overwhelmed with all of that and what I really need is some courage, a pinch of patience and a lot of tolerance to stay a bit longer with the blank page, with the empty space. I know that my craving for this silence, for this emptiness is one of the reasons I go so deep into my dance as that is how I can find this zen zone, this unified field, this refreshing oasis, this present of the present moment. 
So what I want to offer all of us is some empty space. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

With love, Silvija